Saw a play last night based on the Russian story "The Overcoat" at a theatre called The Pit in London's Barbicon Center. It was a very short story, and a very long play. The play was mostly two people with long plastic moustaches talking in silly voices and getting in and out of a cage. Any two drunken 13 year olds could have done a better job with no preparation at all. Drunken 4 year olds would have been even better.

Over the weekend I listened to Stafford and Diane argue about Gladiator. Stafford thought the young Emperor was getting screwed and that the father had no right to deny him the throne, so it was OK to kill him. He also thought the gladiator was far too naive to have been a general in the Roman Army, since this was a highly political position.

Diane's favorite part was, I quote, "when the Gladiator said, 'Don't Fuck With Me, or I'll Kick Your Ass!' Pshoom Pshooo Pshooo! Ahhhhhhh! My Arm! My Eye! 'I told you not to FUCK WITH ME!' Ksssssssah! pssssooom!"

Of course, Stafford is English. So he believes there is some value to being raised as a ruler. He's also first-born in his family, so he identifies with birthright. Diane is American, and she liked the Gladiator's haircut. Especially when he said, "Don't fuck with me!" She also liked his values. I pointed out that he didn't have any values.

He was assigned by the Emperor to keep the power in Rome away from both the Emperor-to-Be, and the Senate because both were corrupt. So he goes around killing slaves for entertainment, and he winds up taking Rome from one evil ruler and handing it to the other. Also, he never thought of escaping, which he could easily have done. He also could have freed his friends, the other slaves. That he did not was a show of support for slavery. And I'm not going to get my hair cut that way just so Diane can pretend I'm the Gladiator.

OK, maybe I am.

Tonight we're going to see Kathleen Turner in The Graduate. Diane didn't want to see it because, "who cares about people who graduate?!" She is angry at the young. I want to see it because Kathleen Turner is supposed to be seductive, and show off her tits. This should help with the aging process. I figure, as i get older, the odds are I will be with older women (unless i make a lot more money than i am making now and can keep trading them in like you're supposed to these days), it will be good to check out an older woman with good references for still being sexually appealing. That could help me ease into my declining years without having to worry about making too much money. That's my rationale, at least.

Oh yeah --in answer to your question, England just jerks off on the 4th of July, imagining they still were America.