"SMOKE 'EM IF YOU GOT 'EM"
1998 U.S. CLUB NATIONALS
OCTOBER 21–24, SARASOTA, FLORIDA

This year's New York masters contigent again featured a number of veteran Nationals champions. Captained by Ken Silver and Sas Peters, Cigar was able to draw more than a few key players who had played competitively in the Open division up until last year.

Two years ago the New York Open division split into two hungry squads and all veterans with enough talent were called into action. Last year one team emerged and this year that team, the WSL All-Stars, tightened ranks.

Combined with the rise of Dark Horse, the youthful Connecticut–Rhode Island team, several talented players were left without a team. Silver and Peters saw an opportunity. Scanning the roster list of the Westchester Summer League (the actual league) Silver identified players with the prerequisite to qualify for Master's—a wife and kid for instance—and recruited.

The team was organized on three main tenants: 1) Win 2) Get everybody playing time and 3) Enjoy Nationals. Evidently these factors were not fully addressed by last year's Master's Champion from New York (and Boston), YESSS.

YESSS did not perform well at World's this year and the performance and attitude of the team splintered some members. Cigar capitalized on this and hoped to make Nationals a tournament worth remembering.

Cigar was undoubtedly stacked with talent. But they had to get past another strong team, this one equipped with talent, ambition, and a little bit of New York's own: attitude.

I first heard about it all when the cartoony José, the short man with the beard and turban from Chicago's Windy City dynasty, angrily approached the Observers with complaints about the nastiness of the SoCal squad Tempus Fugit (Latin for Time Flies).

Of course Windy City was never known to be nice, friendly players. But still the animated José was able to cite specific incidents of questionable spirit from the Fugit fellows.

I had to investigate. But I had to be sneaky. I didn't want to get beat up by a team of 40-year old Ultimate goons.

Tempus Fugit was good. They had a strong squad and they seemed surprisingly comfortable playing with each other. But there were a couple of noticeable hotheads out there running around. And one of them would have for sure pounded me.

Still, they weren't outrageous. A travel call here and there, maybe a few picks and a little bit of steam coming out of their ears on occassion. But their opponents could handle it. If they couldn't, they would have stopped playing Ultimate a long time ago.

POOL PLAY

You can't forget about the Love Handlers. They've been playing Masters longer than many team stay together in the Open division. The Texas-based team couldn't field a full squad this year however. They came to Sarasota a little depleted.

But Chicago's Trouser Schnauser didn't show any love and stopped them cold in the first game, 13–11.

Trouser contained other Windy City member besides José. They were going to be in the hunt for those nifty UPA Championship Hats.

If there were any hats. People like hats, especially ones that say "UPA 1998 Nationals Champions" on them. They made everybody quite happy last year. But none were forthcoming this year.

Anyway, besides Trouser dousing Lover, Cigar schmoked Pocomoke (or Pocokomo?), those DC-based folk, 13–8, despite waiting for 4 players to show up on the plane from New York. And Tempus Fugit dq'd D'K 14–11.

Games were tight all the way around. Pocomoke came close-amoke against Schnauser, before the hairy dog bit them in the end, 14–12. The Love Handlers bought more votes than AARP and won 15–10 while Cigar defeated D'K.

Cigar out-handled the Handlers 15–10 while Tempus clocked Pocomoke 15–9, ending their miserable but hard-fought day. Poor Pocomoke blokes. They played the three top teams in a row before anybody even knew what day it was.

But they came back on Friday and went 3–0 to finish 3–3. They got slighted in the seedings, thats for sure.

So at the end of the day Thursday, Cigar, Tempus Fugit and Trouser Schnauser were all undefeated. They matched up against each other on Friday and that's when all the fun began.

Friday, round two, was when the Schnauser poked the Tempus and got punished, 15–7.

Tempus Fugit may have found success in the Masters division by having played each other so many times. Some version of the team has been together for 4 years or so, playing in the expansive Los Angeles region. Los Angeles Ultimate had been barren for some time, as stronger teams resided in varied suburbs and cities instead, from Santa Barbara to Pasadena to Burbank to Long Beach.

The Burbank and Long Beach teams finally outgrew each other and couldn't find enough players to field a team. They then decided to coombine and send a team to Nationals in the hope of bringing home the gold.

The team features John Babin, a burly mustachioed big guy who looks like he could either be the Marlboro Man or the missing member of the Village People. Tempus relies so much on Babin from Burbank that they have been nicknamed "Team Babin."

According to the press release, Babin can tend to "displace" opponents when going for a loose disc.

Some form of Tempus tried to match wits in the Open division for a few years, but found the Masters much more comfortable. And they were rewarded. Evidentl Judd Nelson, one of those L.A. actor-types, funded the team's beer money and promised them a cameo should they win Nationals. They had something to play for besides those hats.

After losing to Team Babin, the Trouser Schnoz lost momentum and fell to D'K in a great game 15–14.

Cigar played Tempus last in the day. They heard all the rumora about Tempus' temper. But Cigar had rolled a secret weapon: Skip Kuhn.

Kuhn had tangled with Southern California last year at Nationals. But he kept cool all weekend as the team kept up the catchphrase "Don't waste Skip's time" to keep everybody focused.

Skip is still fast as all hell, even if he has, according to him, "lost 2 and a half steps."

Kuhn, along with top-level players Mike Nevins, Matt Jefferson and Paul Shields, propelled Cigar to victory 15–11. But you knew the teams would match up again in the future.

FRIDAY NIGHT

D'K from Atlanta won the Spirit award and the ZZ Top-ophy for most players with beards. José came in second. Rex O'Quinn qualified with his mustache and placed third.

SEMIFINALS and FINALS

In the semis,Cigar snookered Trouser 15–7 and Tempus got by Pocomoke 15–12, a game I'm sure they didn't expect to go that long. Maybe next year Pocomoke will get a better seeding.

So the finals, as expected, Cigar versus Tempus Fugit.

The New York team was just playing too well all weekend. They really gelled in semis and came out strong against L.A. in the finals. Sending their "midgets" through the zone proved effective, while tall men Rick DeMan and Pete Smit stretched the deeps.

John Dickison, Paul Shields and Mike Nevins again played big, while Sanj Khanna, Bill Baer and Mark Schultz buoyed the defense.

They cruised comfortably to a 17–12 win to claim the 1998 Championship.

"Everybody when called upon played great," related captain Silver.

"We may not be the best, but we're up there," proclaimed the image of Bill Clinton on Cigar's t-shirts. They certainly played the best this weekend.

Silver and Peters are looking forward toward keeping the team alive for next year's World's and Nationals' competition.

Congrats to Sas Peters, Ken Silver, Bill Baer, Paul Shields, Eddie Stone, Skip Kuhn, Sam Pugliese, John "Crazy Man" Garb, John Dickison, Doug Propp, Sanj Khanna, Mark Schultz, Matty Jefferson, Neil Perchuk, J. Cobe, Matt Karow, Pete Smit, Alex Milenkovic, Dave Chaiken, Mike Nevins, Joe Hunt, Conrad Aamodt, Eric Cochran, Amos Himmelstein, and Rick DeMan.

This was written for the UPA Newsletter.

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