"Go - Go To The Bank Machine"

PALMS FOR THE POOR

a RECORDED CONVERSATION
READING NO. ONE, PART TWO

by JULIE LEE

When we last left, the Palm Reader had asked Julie if she was experiencing troubles with her stomach. Julie was not experiencing troubles with her stomach. All words are verbatim.
Read it in Part One.

JULIE: where did you see stomach problems?

PALM READER: in the tarot cards

JULIE: oh

PALM READER: are you having stomach problems?

JULIE: well, uh, I’m not sure, but I guess...(editor's note: julie was going to say that she had to go to the bathroom and that she was having trouble with her stools)

PALM READER: your aura is not strong, your aura is not positive like you used to be. your aura lacks a lot of faith out of you. your aura has cracks in it. it drops silver out of your aura -- that’s very dangerous.

JULIE: oh yeah?

PALM READER: that’s why when you're out among friends and family, you’re out having fun you go into these ... you’re working with your hands when you should be working with your mind. you’re very artistic. art, music -- what was your major?

JULIE: photography

PALM READER: that’s artistic! (self-congratulatory pause, continuing) now, what are doing now that you’re not satisfied?

JULIE: well, I guess my job is ok.

PALM READER: where do you work?

JULIE: I work in a darkroom. in a photolab.

PALM READER: you’re very happy but you’re not satisfied, you want to accomplish much more with yourself

JULIE: yeah, but isn’t that always the case?

PALM READER: by your tarot I can tell you're supposed to be leader -- not a follower. you're supposed to be very successful, very happy.

JULIE: so what’s going on?

PALM READER: you're supposed to be with a good relationship. you’re supposed to be in a good career. but you find yourself always going ahead one step in life and always coming back. there's confusement [she actually uses this made-up word] obstacles. there’s a black sphere around your aura that don’t want to make you happy. I can see very strongly an evil spirit around you that doesn’t want to see you successful. do you have an inner child that doesn’t understand you? (this speech is very quick and very jumbled)

JULIE: huh? I don’t know. (...what the hell the palm reader is talking about)

PALM READER: are you being very confused, you have a lot of obstacles around you? or been very down.

JULIE: no

PALM READER: are you happy, say "hi how are you" and then they talk behind your back and there’s enemies all around you. are you acting like a (rambles unintelligently here) be that I may a good spirit, I will invite you to come in. you need spiritual work. for you to have your crystals today. I want to work on your ... from today for every year you’ve been born I need candles. How old are you?

JULIE: uh, 25.

PALM READER: you need 25 candles, that are 2 dollars a candle, pure special candles from Canada. I need your name, date of birth, its casual, its like research to let me know the name the date of birth to know why you are not feeling well, why you are susceptible [suddenly reading into the skepticism of julie’s performance] why you are so worried. I give you a present today so now I have your information. You need 25 candles that are 2 dollars a candle.

JULIE: I see

You Must Ward Off The Spirits By Praying and Paying

A Revelation

PALM READER: (suddenly taking a serious, threatening turn) you hang around with this confusion you hang around with these obstacles you will never succeed. you will never succeed with love you will never succeed with your career. you life will only be hurting You want to do it today, or what are you planning on doing?

JULIE: wow. I didn’t know I was in this much trouble.

PALM READER: you are in many troubles, your aura has been very dull, you need to be healed, you need to be helped.

JULIE: wow

PALM READER: let me help you today, ok?

JULIE: well, yeah, great, I think, wow. (pause) I didn’t think I was in this much trouble! I was thinking I was just getting a reading, you know what I mean?

PALM READER: you need spiritual work. its for the research. to find out what’s going on in your life. its going to let me know your childhood-present-and-future (real quick) and how your career will look and how the person you with now, whether you will care for him or love him and to stick with him or not. whether its true love or not.

JULIE: so you think I should stay with the guy?

PALM READER: I can’t let you know until I do the research.

JULIE: oh, you’re going to do research. how do you go about doing this research stuff?

PALM READER: I go to the church, I light candles, I pray. I meditate. I find out what’s going on. I told you the spirits shall guide me.

JULIE: wow. you can do that?

PALM READER: I can do that. I write you a guarantee. if you don’t see results within 3 days I guarantee your money back. that’s how much we guarantee (she’s shuffling cards again) you will lift the burden off your shoulder you will lift happiness off the past you will see your aura is brighter. you're 50% better -- people will say you look so nice, oh you're so good you’ll look so much better. And you’ll feel better about yourself.

JULIE: wait, which Church do you go to?

PALM READER: (quick response) This in Brooklyn. I don’t reveal my church

JULIE: oh, sorry, sorry sorry. I didn’t know. OK um...

PALM READER: all I need is your name your date of birth and your right phone number for you to come in tomorrow to make an appointment.

JULIE: so that’s like 25 times two, 50 bucks right? wow.

PALM READER: you need a lot of work to be done today

JULIE: Oh, ok, well why don’t I pay you the tarot card reading first.

PALM READER: you're gonna walk out and you’re gonna wake up in confusement. be healed be helped today.

JULIE: but I don’t have the fifty dollars on me now.

PALM READER: you have a bank machine card?

JULIE: uh, yeah, yeah I do.

PALM READER: go. go to the bank machine right across the street.

JULIE: ok, but let me pay you the thing first.

PALM READER: you’re going to go over and you’re not going to come back.

JULIE: but see, I didn’t even expect to pay, uh, like, uh, like 50 dollars today...

PALM READER: its already done, I won’t charge you for the reading. Bring me another 20 and I’m going to go to work for you. For a hundred dollars you get a free reading and you get your spiritual work done. I’ll give you a crystal, ok? [tone of voice: childish pleading, like a father insincerely convincing daughter to finish her homework for a piece of candy]

JULIE: can I think about it?

PALM READER: you shouldn’t think. the more you think the more the demons surround you. You should get help today.

[big pause]

JULIE: (dry) that’s your advice, right.

PALM READER: it’s not my advice its what the tarot cards is telling me. [Julie gives her a twenty.] How much do I give you back

JULIE: well, we set on 8 right, so you give me twelve back.(palm reader opening drawer with money)

PALM READER: Get help today.

JULIE: well, I believe you, you know what I mean?

PALM READER: if you do the work, I’m not going to charge you for the reading. I’m only going to charge you for the work, 40 dollars. do it today why you have the chance.

JULIE: ok well

PALM READER: don’t refuse me...

JULIE: you know what I’m gonna do I’m going to go get a beer and think about it

PALM READER: [yelling] A beer is not going to solve your problems!!!

JULIE: all right, I understand girl! but...you know...

PALM READER: A beer is not going to solve your problems. And do you know why? [pause -- jumbled response]

[it gets louder in tone, kids behind curtain start crying, whining]

PALM READER: go to the bank.

JULIE: ok, but can I take this cigarette?

PALM READER: yeah

JULIE: [laughing] ok thanks!

PALM READER: you going to go? tell me the truth.

JULIE: well, tell you the truth, I don’t know. Seriously. I’m telling the truth. I don’t know. I’m not going to lie to you...you know, because I respect you and stuff

PALM READER: your spirit is telling me you need to be helped. your aura. a good spirit doesn’t want you to walk out...

JULIE: so my aura’s really that bad?

PALM READER: you need to shield it. If you leave it, the more you linger the more confusement, the worse its going to get it. The worse and less happy you’ll be the more cracks. The more work. The more candles. Why not why you’ve got the chance and you're here to heal it -- put it on... put a shield around you.

JULIE: ok

PALM READER: what have you got to lose?

JULIE: ok. wait, what’s your name?

PALM READER: susan

PALM READER: what are you going to do, get 40 dollars and get something you don’t need? or get spiritual work and get help.

JULIE: (penitent) I know. ok.

PALM READER: you’re going to get a pair of shoes that’s going to be waste, going to go in your closet or you’re going to throw away...

JULIE: I know. I’m not out there buying stuff! (exclamatory, defensive)

PALM READER: do it now

JULIE: all right! I’ll seriously think about. (opens door to go out)

PALM READER: ok

JULIE: thanks Susan! (slightly snickering)