PALMS FOR THE POOR

a RECORDED CONVERSATION
READING NUMBER ONE, PART ONE

by JULIE LEE

 

special reading today - 5 dollars! Julie approaches the Palm Reader, who is outside. This is in New York City, in the East Village. All words are verbatim.

JULIE: 5 dollars? all right?

PALM READER: never had your tarot?

JULIE: no actually not

PALM READER: let me do the tarot cards for you - they will tell you everything -- past present future love, a man, answer all your questions. [they move inside] better reading. sit down here

JULIE: OK. [sits down, settles in, eyes pack of marlboro lights] can I have one of your cigarettes?

PALM READER: (gives julie a cigarette) tell me what happened

JULIE: well I saw the special -- 5 dollars -- so I wanted to come in for a 5 dollar reading

PALM READER: why don t you let me do the tarot? i’ll charge you ten dollars for the tarot!

JULIE: but its 25, girl! [sign says $25 for a tarot reading]

PALM READER: I’ll give you for ten

JULIE: why don’t we do it, like -- seven. because you know I came in expecting it to pay 5 dollars and stuff

PALM READER: let me give you tarot cars for ten. they’re going to tell you past present future love romance [a memorized laundry list, read fast]

JULIE: what about the palm reading? the palm reading isn’t going to do that?

PALM READER: (quickly) that tells you a lot about your character and the future. get the tarot. for five more....you’ll never need another reading ever

JULIE: all right - 8! (laughs) I know its funny but come on girl I didn’t expect it!

PALM READER: shuffle these cards.

JULIE: 8, yeah?

PALM READER: yeah.

JULIE: can I have a match? (palm reader gives her matches)

PALM READER: oh we don’t smoke in the house, we have babies.

JULIE: oh, ok, I’m sorry... I saw the cigarettes.ok, so I have to shuffle the cards

PALM READER: ok, the result of your tarot cards. my name is Susie, what’s yours?

JULIE: Julie

PALM READER: Julie

JULIE: uh-huh

PALM READER: Julie, is this your first reading?

JULIE: (lying) yeah. Actually. I’ve never done it before

 

** FLASH ** Curly to Jesus, Over
Disco Mama

PALM READER: Julie, by your tarot I can see a long life. by your tarot I can see a change in the background of your people. Julie, by your tarot whatever you say you say with specifics. by your tarot, I can see you moving into a new atmosphere and a change in address coming your way. good luck with this change of address because to be successful you’re going to be moving in with someone you are caring for.

JULIE: what happened?

PALM READER: you're going to be moving in with someone you are caring for.

JULIE: moving?

PALM READER: with someone you are caring for.

JULIE: what time does that -- what?

PALM READER: (annoyed) care. like love somebody.

JULIE: right now?

JULIE: yeah.

PALM READER: how long have you been in this relationship?

JULIE: uh...can you tell by the tarot cards? or no?

PALM READER: it’s been not even a year yet, right?

JULIE: no

PALM READER: how long?

JULIE: I think like 8 months.

PALM READER: told you - not even a year!

JULIE: yeah, but how can you tell though?

PALM READER: (spoken very quickly and jumbled, with Julie's "um" and "uhs" in between) I can see when you love you love strong very much you show people love and care, but even when you love and care for someone you feel they don’t love you back. you have good luck to meet people but let me tell you something you don’t have good luck to stay with anyone. you smile upon your face but your heart is not happy your heart is not content. you went through a lot of love. as quickly as lovers came as quickly as lovers went. I can see you are having trouble sleeping. You toss you turn like a fish out of water. Lack a lot of faith on yourself, a burden on your shoulder. You are not eating as well and having stomach problems.

continued...

 

Stomach Problems?
Or Chest pains?
 
What Time Is It

 

*** PEOPLE WE KNOW AND LIKE CAN BE FOUND AT WATERBONG.NET AND CRANK.COM ***

 

Fuckaround Part II
BY ERIC MESSENGER

Fuckaround Part II
BY ERIC MESSENGER

Pez
BY JESS VAN BRUNT

My Personality
BY RIVATIVE

 

• • •

 

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